Cosmic Diaspora

I am afraid,

afraid to let myself free,

to allow myself to take wing,

to be the star-shining butterfly locked inside of me.

Chained by my mind in a cage of lies,

but still she shines,

patiently awaiting to be set free.

With loving light she shine in me.

she holds no grudge,

nor passes a judgment,

as I argue and fight my own transformation.

Evolving a state of discretion,

filled with blues no window could take.

Chaotic mind,

paralytic state,

pushing, pulling, and falling down.

Forcing myself up off the ground.

Self evolution, 

re-birthed, anew,

knowing this is my inevitable truth.

Getting out of my own way is what I must do,

but this heavy weight makes me struggle to get through.

To let go, it seems I just can’t do.

But this beautiful light locked inside,

is worth all my efforts,

worth winning this fight,

this fight, I have created within the confines of my own mind.

Finally shattering my paradigm of lies.

No longer living an illusion of comfort.

A comfort, discomfort, aimless reach.

Comfort in the known limits so habitual to me.

Indeed, a discomfort so familiar it seems.

A concept of home it has become to me.

Displaced in furthest thing from home.

Left to roam with a feeling of disgrace.

Displaced from home in a forgetful state.

Home, home, I want to go home,

But to where it is I do not know,

I’ll fallen down a spiraling hole,

where direction leads with a linear tone.

Tone deaf is what I have been programmed to be.

Missing the rhythms,

I have forgotten me,

I have forgotten we,

the harmonious vibrations we were meant to be.

Unchaining myself so we can finally be… FREE!

The Chains of Platitude

Tears beg to drain my pain.
The gates overflow with the expression I can’t seem to let go.
The overflow remains, even as a few drops is all that escapes.
I try and try to let them flow,
Yet still they flood inside of me, never allowing the cleanse I need.
I pray the sky showers me,
With the cosmic love that is we.
Humanity feels so hollow.
Tis my mother’s touch that nurtures me,
Tis my sister who fills me with embrace,
Tis my brother who lightens my darkened days,
Tis the roots in the ground that runs through my veins,
Not the emptiness this gravity chains.
As I contemplate my very essence,
I resonate more with the wind and the trees,
And less with the dogmatic ego that feeds on We.
Who am I, is the question!
For I’ve lost the words to answer the question.
I know not that of my reflection as I look deep inside.
A confused silence echoes unidentifiable sounds,
I cannot comprehend, I cannot explain, no words can do it justice,
I sit in this gravitational pull, as another tear fails to escape.
I drown,
Drown in the overflow, longing for We.
Yet in this platitude all I see is me…

The Little Things That You Do To Keep Me Loving You

Hold me tight as I kiss your soul with my poetic flows.
Each word speaks the truth I know.
You are mine and I am yours.
As time goes by our trust matures.
In these lines I wrote for you, is everything I see in you.
As we grow I want you to know,
I’m by your side the whole way through.
You are the God to my Goddess,
The lock to my key,
You keep me strong when I am weak.
Without you, I would see everything blindly.
You are my rock.
You keep me real.
You always show me how you feel.
You take your time to love me right.
Even when I ain’t right, you always stand by my side.
You let me know your inner soul.
With you I have a home.
In your arms is the safest place.
I know in my heart we will never part.
When I look at you,
I see right through,
To the core I cling to.
I feel your warmth on my flesh, as I start to get undressed.
We make love the whole night through.
Damn baby, I love you, for all that you do to show me my worth to you.
You make me the happiest I’ve ever seen.
I’d never let you go,
I’d never creep, because baby you have all that I need.

Temporary Blues

Loneliness spills from my eyes.
I can’t find the words to describe why,
These emotions keep harbor within these once shallow shores.
The buildup breaks the levies and the floodgates pour.
The reasons why… I cannot wrap around my mind.
Nonetheless, the tears stream down my cheeks,
And in this moment I feel weak.
My power, I feel, is pouring out of me.
I don’t know how to shake this heavy feeling that anchors me down into an abyss.
I want to breathe, but the overflow rapes me of my clarity.
Ohh creator, please carry me.
Hold me tight as I try to pick up the pieces of my sight.
Lift me up.
Be my light.
Give me the strength to weather this storm.
I cannot do this alone!
Shelter me within your loving embrace.
Nurse me back to my cosmic strength,
And when it’s time, let me got free.
Like a butterfly taking wing,
I will rise,
I will fly free,
With the breath of your light guiding me,
To the love that has been and will always be, in every single part of me.

No Words To Express

We use to talk everyday.

Been so lonesome since you went away.

It’s been so long and stills no word.

Why haven’t I heard from you at all?

Had no chance to say goodbye.

Now all I see is the tears I cry.

Stuck in a somber,

Stuck in the last,

The last time I seen you, which is in the past.

Sorry.. so sorry is all that was said,

As you lay still with one last breath.

As I lay still with a painful chest,

In disbelief and so much regret.

Wishing I could’ve stopped the turn of death.

Have you here safe with me.

With a smile planted on your face for all to see.

I love you… I love you… is all I cry,

As I say one last painful goodbye.

Lingering Thoughts I Can No Longer Hide

Thoughts of you flow though my head.

Out of no where you came back in.

Into my mind,

into my head,

into my every step.

I do not know WHY, or how this came to be.

I felt in my soul that I was completely over…

Over what used to be my everything.

There’s no where to hide, no where to escape you.

Your in my heart, your in my dreams.

In every song I hear and sing, in every happy memory I speak.

When I close my eye’s it’s you I see.

I do not understand… Understand why this is happening.

I know we will never be.

And honestly even if we did… we’ve changed so much I don’t think we’d even fit.

Yet your where my mind is!

I know we don’t even speak, yet I can’t keep my mind from thoughts of you and me.

When we talk it’s so awkward, yet none of this seems to matter.

It’s like, I know we are forever done.

Yet you dominate my every thought.

A couple of days ago, you could’ve asked me if I was over you,

And in my heart I swear I believed it was true.

Yet today is another day, and if you asked I wouldn’t know what to say.

My dreams say I want you back.

Every song I hear produces tears when it speaks of how you used to make me feel.

I don’t know when this came to be, or if you’ll care, or even believe.

Shit I don’t even know what to say,

Or how to react to the fact that every time I smile, It’s memories of you and me that passes by.

Every tear from joy and pain, is from our has been’s and no more’s.

I’m confused to the depth of me, and saddened because even if these feelings remain I know I’ll never again be your everything.

I’ll never feel how we used to be, in love so profoundly.

I remember how you were the only one who made me feel feelings I had no words to describe.

You made me speechless!

Before you, that was never done.

And even now, no one has been able to fill the shoes.

The shoes that you wore so flawlessly.

Yet now we’re just a place in time…

We can’t get back…

We can’t rewind.

And as I write this I can’t decide, to let you know or just hold it inside.

So as another minute passes by, just know it’s you I can’t get out of my mind.